Should You Have Kids If You Can’t Afford Their Future?
How financially prepared should someone be before having children?
One person is questioning whether it is responsible to bring a child
into today’s world without being able to guarantee them a financially
secure future.
They are not only thinking about food, shelter, and childhood
expenses. They believe parents should be able to provide a fully paid
education, support into adulthood, and even help with the purchase of
a first home.
With rising housing costs, expensive education, unstable jobs, debt,
and so many adults struggling to stay afloat, should someone wait to
have children until they can afford the future they imagine for them?
Or can the desire to eliminate every possible hardship become a level
of fear and certainty that no parent can realistically achieve?
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Listen while you work, drive, exercise, or take care of your family.
Love, stability, and the responsibility of parenthood
Having children is a major decision, and Bri does not treat it
lightly.
Financial stability matters. Children need food, housing, healthcare,
education, safety, guidance, and parents who are willing to make
sacrifices for them. But money is not the only factor that determines
whether a family can be healthy, loving, and strong.
Bri challenges the idea that someone must fund twenty years of a
child’s future before becoming a parent. No parent can guarantee every
opportunity, protect a child from every hardship, or know exactly what
that child’s future will become.
At the same time, love should not become an excuse to ignore
responsibility. Bri explains that someone facing severe instability
or struggling to meet basic needs may need to wait before adding more
responsibility.
She also shares how she and her husband waited years before having a
child together. They wanted a larger home, greater stability, and the
confidence that welcoming another child would not take opportunities
away from the children they were already raising.
The goal was not to predict and fully finance every year of a child’s
life. It was to begin from a place of love, intention, stability, and
a willingness to continue growing as a family.
What this conversation asks us to consider
Parenthood should be genuinely desired
Children deserve parents who truly want the responsibility of
loving, protecting, guiding, and raising them.
Money is one factor, not the whole foundation
Financial resources can create stability and opportunity, but they
cannot replace love, presence, character, consistency, or care.
Love and responsibility belong together
Loving a child also means thinking honestly about housing,
stability, family capacity, existing responsibilities, and the
sacrifices parenthood may require.
You cannot guarantee every part of a child’s future
Parents can prepare, save, plan, and provide, but they cannot predict
every opportunity, hardship, decision, or purpose their child will
encounter.
Sometimes waiting is the responsible decision
When someone is already facing extreme financial instability or
struggling to meet basic needs, it may not be the right time to add
more responsibility.
Preparation does not require perfection
The goal is not to have every future expense completely funded. It
is to enter parenthood intentionally and remain committed to
growing, providing, and showing up.
Featured quote from Episode 11
“Money is only one factor in raising good, solid children. One of
many. The main thing you need to have is love.”
Responsible preparation should not become controlling fear
Financial preparation is an important part of stewardship, but no
amount of money can remove every uncertainty from a child’s life.
In this episode, Bri points the writer toward Jesus as the Prince of
Peace. The problem is not that they are thinking carefully about
parenthood. Thoughtfulness and responsibility matter.
The problem begins when preparation becomes constant anxiety, when
every future hardship must be prevented, and when peace depends on
having complete control over circumstances that no person can fully
control.
Faith does not remove responsibility. It gives us peace while we make
wise decisions, accept what we cannot guarantee, and trust God with
the future we cannot completely see.
How financially stable should someone be before becoming a parent?
Are love, commitment, and a willingness to grow enough to begin, or
should certain financial milestones come first?
Some questions need more than a quick answer.
Money, marriage, parenting, family, faith, and responsibility often
overlap. When the answer is not obvious, you deserve a place to talk
honestly about what you are facing.
Submit your Thorn Letter and your situation may be discussed
anonymously in a future episode of 13:22 Life.
